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Show, Don’t Tell

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By Janet Evanovich

If I had to choose what the most important principle of fiction is, I guess I’d go with show, don’t tell.  This means that, instead of stating a situation flat out, you want to let the reader discover what you’re trying to say by watching a character in action and by listening to his dialogue.  Showing brings your characters to life.  For example, instead of telling the reader Anthony was angry, you would show Anthony bursting through the kitchen door, slamming his keys onto the table, and saying, “Okay, who the hell ate jelly doughnuts in my new car?”

Again, because it’s so important: Don’t tell the reader anything, if you can show it instead.

There are times when telling is better than showing.  Sometimes you need some background information to get your story off and running, or sometimes mid-story you need to fill in the reader a bit.  In that case, you can do one or two paragraphs of exposition.  Exposition is essentially “telling” your reader some information necessary to the story.

Here’s an example of some lead-in dialogue followed by a chunk of exposition.

 

“You know what!” I said to Vinnie, hands fisted on hips.  “Joyce Barnhardt, that’s what.  You hired Joyce to do skip tracing.”

                        “So what’s the big deal?  I hired Joyce Barnhardt.”

                        “Joyce Barnhardt does makeovers at Macy’s.”

                        “And you used to sell ladies’ panties.”

                        “That was entirely different.  I blackmailed you into giving me this job.”

                        “Exactly,” Vinnie said.  “So what’s your point?”

                        “Fine!” I shouted.  “Just keep her out of my way!  I hate Joyce Barnhardt!”

                        And everybody knew why.  At the tender age of twenty-four, after less than a year of marriage, I’d caught Joyce bare-assed on my dining room table, playing hide-the-salami with my husband.  It was the only time she’d ever done me a favor.  We’d gone through school together, where she’d spread rumors, told fibs, ruined friendships, and peeked under the stall doors in the girls’ bathroom to see people’s underpants.

She’d been a fat kid with a terrible overbite.  The overbite had been minimized by braces, and by the time Joyce was fifteen she’d trimmed down to look like Barbie on steroids.  She had chemically enhanced red hair done up in big teased curls.  Her nails were long and painted, her lips were high gloss.  She was an inch shorter than me, five pounds heavier, and had me beat by two cup sizes.  She had three ex-husbands and no children.  It was rumored she had sex with large dogs.

                                                                        –Four to Score

 

Exposition is background material written in narrative form.

Keep your exposition as short and lively as you can.  One of the potential problems with exposition is that it can become tedious and uninteresting, and the reader tends to skip over it.

 

Q:  I’m worried I’ll tell the reader too much when I should be showing.  How do I know when to show and when to tell?

A:  Usually, it’s just a matter of variety.  If you’ve got lots of dialogue, you can insert a chunk of exposition to break things up.