By Molly Nickle
Becoming a traditionally published author depends on making the mind shift from “telling” to “selling.” In other words, you need to sell the agent on the facts that you are (1) a skillful writer and (2) have a saleable manuscript. That’s the goal of the query letter.
Agents want to know, in a nano-second (or less) if you have a manuscript they can sell, and if you have the writing skills to produce it. You have two brief paragraphs to make your case.
Your first paragraph must entice them—make them curious–so they’ll want to know more. This is why I teach my clients to craft a first paragraph which includes:
- who wants what
- why they want it
- what/who stands in their way
- the possible outcome, including the “or else” that will occur if they don’t succeed.
This first paragraph reveals the bare bones of your plot, or in non-fiction, your focus. Often it’s the only portion of the query letter ever read by the agent. If it doesn’t peak their interest, right up front, they move on to the next query.
Your second paragraph expands on the first. Add the protagonist’s name, describe more fully what they want, what action they’re taking to achieve that goal, and what major obstacle (antagonist) stands in their way. Forget the “and they all lived happily ever after” ending. End with a tease. Why? You want the agent to wonder, “and then what happens” so they’ll request a manuscript submission.
My darling writers, this is not rocket science. It’s smart thinking. Smart presentation. It’s being a smart salesperson by addressing the agent’s need to know WIIFM (What’s In It For Me?).
In my former life as a publisher, when I read a query that quickly and effectively told me what I wanted to know, I’d jump up and down, click my heels together, and order pizza while yelling, “Woo-Hoo!”
Little Engine that Could Success Story
Once upon a time a writer invented a story-telling technique using made-up words and unusual illustrations. After completing his first book, he began to query. Twenty-seven rejections later, this writer was ready to quit. Family and friends offered encouragement, “you can do it, you can do it.” The writer continued to submit his manuscript. The list of potential recipients dwindled. Then voila! He received a “yes.” What followed? The publication of one book that sold well. Then came a second book, then a third, then a flood of books. Books-bazillion! Eventually, millions of this writer’s books were sold worldwide. In fact, this writer continues to be one of America’s best-selling authors. Who created this dream career by not giving up? Follow the HINTS.
First Page Factoid
The first page of your manuscript is written for one person. Guess who? Stars and applause for you if you answered, “the agent who reads it.” You want the agent to take a specific action. What is that? More applause coming your way if you answered, “turn the page.”
You need to write 170 words (or less) to accomplish this goal. Why only 170 words? Because you have half a page–or less–left for text after you set the page up in the industry-established format: contact information, tab down to leave approximately 15 open lines, then center your title, with by-line underneath.
Your well-chosen words must incorporate one or more of the following:
- Interesting concept
- Curiosity about what’s going on
- Thought provoking ideas
- Fascinating character (s)
- Suggestion of interesting actions to come
- Sense of urgency/tension/peril/threat
Remember, the goal of the first page is to MOTIVATE THE AGENT to turn the page. That’s it!
Chat with the Query Wizard
Molli Nickell
The Query Club
Molli lives in Pinellas County. She stays on top of industry changes. Contact her for help with your query letters.
Dumb Query Trick
Never ever, ever include any recommendations from others in your query letter.
- “My sister, my neighbor, my boss, the mailman, my children, and my mother-in-law (who is really critical), just love my story.” Guess what? No agent in the universe cares about what anybody thinks about your manuscript, including your mom-in-law unless she’s the President of Simon and Schuster, in which case, why do you need an agent?
The Synopsis Shrink
What’s the purpose of the synopsis? To tell the gist of your story, start to finish, focusing on the actions/thoughts/feelings of your protagonist.
Sounds simple doesn’t it? Not so. In truth, writing a synopsis is just as challenging as writing a query letter.
Most agents request that you submit a synopsis when they ask for a manuscript submission. In the good old days (like last year), a synopsis could be three-to-five pages. Today, they’re one or two. Max.
Before you begin, revisit the information you’ve already written in the first two paragraphs of your query letter. Use this as you write your synopsis first paragraph which introduces the protagonist. What does this person want and why?
Second and third paragraphs show the protagonist struggling through obstacles in order to get what they want. It also introduces the antagonist and perhaps one other main character.
Last paragraph reveals the triumph (or failure) of the main character.
Keep in mind your synopsis is a make-or-break deal. Write it well and the agent actually will read your manuscript. Write it poorly and it will not be read. Agents believe (and rightly so), that if you aren’t skillful enough to tell your story in one page, chances are you don’t have the writing skills to tell it in a full-length manuscript.
My second mini-workbook will focus on writing a quick-read and effective synopsis.
Agent Update
Who is looking for what and how to reach them.
New agents, as well as new agencies, always are scrambling to sign up clients as they build their lists. Send them the very best query letter you can possibly write. (Build your query-writing skills using information and exercises from my query letter mini-workbook and teaching sites listed on the left.)
- Michael Stearns, Chris Michman and Danielle Chiotti have left Firebrand Literary (now closed) to form Upstart Crow Literary Agency.
- Adriana Dominquez has joined Full Circle Literary as an agent. She left Harper Children’s and plans to continue representing picture books, MG, and YA as well as other genre. Full Circle Literary.
- Lucinda Blumenfeld recently left Scholastic’s Custom Media Division to join Fletcher and Company Literary and may be adding MG and children’s books to her “areas of interest.” Despite information given on the company website, she prefers to receive email queries directly at the agency.
- Monica Verma is a newly added agent at Levine Greenberg Literary Agency
- Erin Edmison is a new agent, actively seeking clients at the Karpfinger Agency.
Need some query letter, synopsis, first page, or proposal writing/revision assistance? Check out my current offers for writers at The Query Club.
Query Letter Red Flags
You’ll want to craft your snail-mail query letter so it immediately reflects your professionalism. The only contact information you need is your name, address, telephone # and email address. This usually is stacked at the upper left corner of your letter. If you include your website, blog address, writing affiliations, awards, and/or blood type, this not only wastes space, but also announces:
“AMATEUR! AMATEUR! REJECT! REJECT!”
NOTE: Give yourself extra space for the body of your query by centering contact info in one line across the top, using 10-point Ariel. The “who of you” isn’t nearly as important as the “what” being offered. It’s smarter to use all available space to sell your skill and your project. Save your “other” personal information for the third paragraph of your query.(Except for the blood type–unless your manuscript is about vampires or the agent you’re contacting is one.)
The format for email queries is different. Check out an example on my teaching website, Get Published Now, or wait until next month when I’ll include guidance on writing 16 perfect lines to prevent your e-query from flying into delete-ville.
| Insider Business Buzz Heard at a recent NY writers’ conference, the publishing biz new motto: “flat is the new up.” Meaning the biz is alive, but not expanding or contracting. That’s a mix of good news/bad news. |
Publishers are trimming back costs as they determine how to develop e-publishing divisions. Most are releasing (firing) some editors, cutting back publishing lists, and more carefully scrutinizing potential manuscript purchases.
The surviving editors now handle double or triple the workloads as they prepare manuscripts for publication. They no longer have time to help writers tighten and edit their work before it’s published.
The ripple effect? Editing and clean-up work responsibility is shifting to agents. They now have the task of helping clients (or potential clients) polish manuscripts until they glow in the dark. Because of this, their workload is increasing. This means agents are making decisions to “pass” or “accept” manuscripts based on three criteria instead of two:
- Does the writer have skill?
- Is the manuscript saleable?
- How much editing and revision will be required before presentation to editors at the most appropriate publishing houses?
| An Offer You Can’t Refuse How much better can any deal be? How about an information-and-writing-exercise-packed workbook, available for a limited time at no charge! To receive your PDF download of the workbook, simply go to The Query Club and sign up to become a Query Club Premium member using the button at the bottom of the first page. Immediately, a “welcome” email (giving you the link to the workbook PDF download) will fly to your in-box. |
Tons of in-depth information about the query, query examples, first page tips, and more, can be found at Get Published Now, my teaching website.
In Closing
Keep writing. Keep improving your skill. Keep tightening your stories. Keep those queries circulating. Become your own version of “The Little Engine that Could.” No matter the invitation to do otherwise, never give up!
Look forward to speaking with you during the Query Wizard chat on August 19th. (See above for time and dial-in procedure). If you have questions/comments/requests about this newsletter, send them to me. Thanks for your interest.
Write on!
Molli Nickell
The Query Club